Why should I not die? Honest question. Please don't block this.?

25 yrs old, from India, in a dead-end job, no energy to pursue education, although passed my 12th science after a 7 year gap this year. Just got told by mom yesterday that i was not supposed to be born at all; after 5 abortions, docs refused to abort me and i was born. Three months ago stopped all communication with a girl i am still madly in love with, the only girl i have ever been with (she wanted to be close friends). Alcoholic abusive dad, have had to put up with his shouting screaming n his violence EVERY night for 20 years to the point i get scared if someone even shouts in the street. I am ashamed to even go out because i'm labeled the drunkard's son. Underweight all my life, although been working out recently. Suicide seems so peaceful for me. There is no purpose for me here anymore in this world. Is there any meaningful reason? any at all to live?? I stopped believing in god a long time ago by the way. Are these problems trivial, be honest.